9 ways to help a friend who wants to lose weight
Spare them the unsolicited advice and try these tips instead.
In this article:
When a friend or family member tells you about a new weight loss goal, your first impulse may be to share what has worked for you in the past, offer to be their "accountability buddy," or offer up advice around food or activity. Not so fast! Just like everyone's weight loss journey is different, so is everyone's perspective on how much involvement they'd like to have from other people.
That said, you can still play an important role in your friend’s success. After all, science suggests there may be an association between social support and weight loss—even online: In a 2018studypublished in theJournal of Internal Medicine, researchers found that when people working toward a weight loss goal had an internet-based support system, they lost an average of 3.4 percent of their weight after 24 months while those without the online group counseling lost just 1.6 percent.
Whether you’re hoping to stand by someone who’s embarking on a brand new weight loss journey or reinvigorate a friend who’s working through another challenging setback, here’s how to pump up the encouragement and exercise compassion every step of the way:
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When they start their weight loss journey…
Give the gift of time.Losing weight takes effort and preparation, and many people feel they lack the time to devote to their health. Offering to babysit a friend’s kids so they can get to the gym, or packing an extra apple for a crazed co-worker, for example, can be just as important as providing emotional support, says Deborah Tate, PhD, a professor in the department of health behavior at the University of North Carolina Chapel Hill’s Gillings School of Global Public Health.
Skip the drill sergeant behavior.Getting peppered with questions about what you’re eating or whether you’ve worked out today is zero fun. You might think you’re helping by holding your loved one accountable, but the interrogation can cause the person to feel overly stressed, Tate says. Your job is to be their friend, not their patroller.
Realize they aren’t you.Everyone’s weight loss journey is different, so keep in mind that what worked for you won’t necessarily be effective for your friend. That said, you can still share aspects of your experience. If your friend is looking for low PersonalPoints™value dinner ideas, for example, she’d probably be excited if you sent her the recipes you love to whip up.