Wellbeing

When Reality Strikes

By Kenneth Selke

I hate to admit it, but it’s happened. Just a few weeks ago, I turned 30 years old. I’m no longer considered anything other than “an adult.” It’s final! So, my entire family went to celebrate my undeniable adulthood by going to Disneyland, of course! Coming across a milestone year like this one makes me think of all the expectations I had for myself, like where I should be in my life by now, how much money I should be making at my job, how successful I should be, how I should be starting my family, owning a home, driving a nice car, etc.

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Reality: My career is going well, but not quite where I’d like it to be, I have made improvements in my life in terms of my health, happiness, and finding love, I don’t have enough money to buy a home or put down a payment on a car, and I’m not yet a father. Expectations vs. reality can eat away at your soul, and leaving you feeling like you haven’t lived up to your potential. I know I have been having feelings along these lines, even though I wish I could cut that negativity out of my life.

When I take a step back and look at my life as a whole, it doesn’t quite meet up with where I would’ve expected myself to be at this point. I’ve always been a hard worker, whether in school or in my various jobs, even in my drive to accomplish my goals. What’s most disappointing to me is that I have tried so hard to work toward accomplishing all my goals, but have fallen short. However, I don’t think there is any good to be had in living in the past and fixating on it. All I can do is learn from all those instances where I let myself down, and try to use those lessons to make better decisions in the future.

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In all honesty, I should be excited to have turned 30 years old. While I may not be quite where I expected to be in life, I realize all the blessings that surround me. I have a wonderful wife and family who would do anything for me, a job that keeps a roof over our heads, a truck that gets me from A to B, and I’ve still made massive improvements in regards to my health, even though I am still not at my ideal goal weight. I won’t stop trying, pushing, and working toward my goals. I may not have achieved all of them by my 30th birthday, but there’s nothing holding me back from achieving them within the next few years!

Follow Kenny Selke on Connect @KDSelke and read more from The Big Guy's Big Journey.