Time for a reality check
Ease your mind and overcome all-or-none thinking with these three simple steps
Do you see things in an all-or-none way? Do you often view situations and outcomes as black or white, good or bad, perfection or failure?
All of us can point to such situations in our own lives. Maybe you’ve eaten something unplanned, and felt bad afterward, then went ahead and ate more because the whole day was “wrecked.” Or you missed a yoga class, felt disappointed, and then skipped the whole week.
When all-or-none thinking is applied to other simple scenarios, the cracks in the logic appear quickly. For instance, let’s say you make a wrong turn while driving. You didn’t think to yourself, “Now I’ve ruined this whole drive, I’ll never get to my destination,” and then continue to make wrong turns.
Despite the obvious flaws in the thought process, all-or-none thinking can still creep into our everyday lives- it’s a human response. We know that what we think impacts how we feel, which in turn drives the things we do. In this way, all-or-none thoughts can lead you to feel, and then act, in ways that undermine your weight and wellness journey.
The “check” list
As your Weekly explains, you can overcome this unhelpful thinking style by reorienting these thoughts so they are more realistic and balanced. Here’s how to shift your all-or-none thoughts in a way that has a positive impact on how you feel and act along your journey:
Pay attention to the thoughts you have about your weight and wellness journey, and identify all-or-none thoughts. For example, have you ever thought “If I don’t meet my activity goal this week, then I’m a failure”?
When you have such a thought, perform one of the two following reality checks:
Fact Check: Ask yourself, “What is the evidence that this thought is true? What is the evidence that it’s not true?”
Friend Check: Ask yourself, “What would I tell a friend or family member if they had the same thing happen to them?”
So, then you would ask yourself, “If I don’t meet one of my goals, does that really mean I am a failure at everything? Is it realistic to expect perfection?
Take a moment to develop a new thought that is realistic and balanced . . . and will move you closer to your weight and wellness goals. Your new thought may be “Nobody’s perfect and I’m not a failure if I am unable to meet one of my goals. I have made many changes on this journey, and seen progress. When I aim for perfection, I’m setting myself up to feel disappointed. I am only human and life happens. I will try my best, and if I don’t meet my activity goal, I will make adjustments next week.”